Ending Emotional Eating
The other night, I met with a new client and we talked for quite a while about the importance of eating healthy foods, making wise choices, and being accountable for what we eat. Before she left, she asked “So, do you eat perfect ALL of the time?”
Oh man! How I wished that my answer could have been an honest, “Yes, of course I eat perfectly!” However, that would have made me a big fat liar and since I’m trying to avoid being fat, I answered her honestly…. which was, “Heck no! I’m not a perfect eater… but I try dang hard to make healthy choices the majority of the time.”
I’ve always been a conscious eater and I go to great lengths to eat clean and watch my portion sizes. However, we all have weaknesses… and unfortunately, one of my most frustrating weakness is eating when I get stressed, lonely or sad.
Simply put? I’m an emotional eater. Or at least I used to be. Okay, okay, so I still struggle with it from time to time, but after realizing the bad habit I had allowed myself to get into several years ago, I have worked hard at overcoming it. I am now constantly on guard and evaluating my eating habits, making sure that I stay on track and eat for physical hunger and not for emotional hunger.
I have not always been an emotional eater. In fact, this annoying little habit didn’t form until a few years ago when I was experiencing a particularly difficult time in my life. I was feeling such strong emotions… ones that I had never felt before… and without even realizing it, I was drowning my feelings in food! Granola cereal to be exact. I would eat bowls and bowls of granola cereal whenever I felt these yucky, uncomfortable feelings of loss, loneliness and sadness. It took months and months, (and a bigger size of jeans), before I realized what I was doing to myself! The problem I faced however, was that by the time I figured out what my problem was, it had already turned into a terrible habit. (And we all know how hard it is to break a habit, right?)
With a lot of patience, I learned how to be more aware of my feelings and my needs. I also learned healthy methods and techniques to help me deal with those uncomfortable feelings… WITHOUT a spoon in my hand! (And truth be told, I don’t always eat granola when I eat emotionally – cookies and toast do the trick too – but you know what they say, “Once a granolaholic, always a granolaholic.”)
The fact of the matter is, human nature hungers to be filled. And all too often, it seems like we are wandering to and fro, trying to fill our inner void with THINGS. Unfortunately, emotional eating is like any other form of addiction or method we use to fill an empty gap in our soul. Some people turn to alcohol or drugs. Others take shopping to the extreme. But trying to solve our emptiness this way usually comes at great cost… and afterwards, our soul hunger is still with us. We remain incomplete and empty until we nurture our spirit inside and discover exactly what it is that our inner being needs. By ignoring our REAL needs, we continue to mask our problem with a solution that will never work.
So what can you do to end emotional eating?
1. The first thing you need to do in order to overcome emotional eating is to BE AWARE.
Know yourself and recognize your weaknesses. Understand your strengths. Know the habits you want to get rid of and discover good habits that you want to develop.
2. The second thing you need to do to overcome emotional eating is to SET GOALS.
Until we set goals and work toward achieving them, we are wishy washy and unstable. We are driven by uncontrolled wants and feelings. We MUST have firm goals set in place before we can master our weaknesses.
3. The last thing you need to do to overcome emotional eating is BE PERSISTENT.
Don’t give up on yourself if you have a bad moment and gorge on your comfort foods. Don’t think you’ve failed because of one bump in the road. Get up, dust yourself off and get right back on track to eating for hunger – not for emotions. As you work toward overcoming this discouraging habit, take one day at a time. Have faith in yourself and know that with work and dedication you can and you WILL overcome emotional eating.
If any of you out there have ever suffered from emotional eating, I know how you feel. It sucks. But I also believe that we are given challenges in life to test our strength and to help us grow. Facing challenges in life – no matter how big or small – help us become stronger people, more understanding of others and gives us character and the chance to be REAL. So look at this as an opportunity to become a better person and start today to overcome the habit of emotional eating.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Have you ever struggled with emotional eating? If so, how do you deal with it? What tips and advice do you have to share with others?
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7 Responses to “Ending Emotional Eating”
Krista
November 3rd, 2008
I love the idea about the place mats! I’ve seen those done before as a kids craft, but who knew I could make one for myself that would actually be motivating?
Great post Liz! I’m working really hard at not making myself feel guilty for ordering a really yummy creamy pasta entree when I go out to dinner. I figure if I just eat it, satisfy the craving and then be done I will go on and make a better choice next time. I think you hit the bulls eye when you said you try hard to make healthy choices the MAJORITY of the time. That’s really the key. As long as you are eating healthy 90% of your day/week/month then I think it’s OK to enjoy that other 10% and not feel guilty about it.
I am writing this mostly to myself so I can practice what I preach! I better go eat a whole lot of fruits and vegetables now because I already went over the my 10% on my kids Halloween candy!!!
Nikki
November 3rd, 2008
There is also a body of research that shows how a diet high in sugar helps fuel those ‘bad’ emotions that drive us to eat when sad, mad, anxious, happy, worried, concerned, elated….
But even with a diet that reduces this effect, eating to soothe our feelings is a natural thing.
For me, becoming AWARE of the food I ate helped a lot. Mindfulness Meditation was a great tool.
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DR
November 3rd, 2008
That is a brilliant idea Krista! I am SO going to do that! 
And Nikki – I’m so glad that you don’t let yourself suffer from guilt… that just brings us down and makes the whole home un-happy. You know the saying, “If mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy” – well, when I allow guilt to take over, I become an unhappy woman and then my poor family suffers too. Great advice! And Doug – I had no idea that studies have proven that sugar can fuel those bad feelings, but it sure makes sense! Thanks for sharing!
Liz Rosenbaum
November 3rd, 2008
and we dont want you to be perfect…just to meet us where we are, to nomalize what we’re feeling and help us find our way.
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MizFit
November 5th, 2008
Hey, Liz I too struggle with this. SInce I have been home more I find it so easy to want to make treats & snack on unhealthy things. I am also a nervous snacker being that I can’t just sit down & watch TV without eating a bad habit I got into. But I have found a solution to my problem- sugar free gum. It keeps my mouth moving without my waist size increasing. Just another idea.
Nancy
November 6th, 2008
ohhh this is soo totally me! i punich others by eating. sounds weird- but that is MY issue… i think- well, i’ll show HIM- and eat like WHATEVER i see!
good post- and i love the info
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Annie
November 8th, 2008
One thing I have done is to make place-mats!! Decorate them on poster-board the size of what a dinner mat would be. Then I decorated them HOWEVER I wanted…Positive words and positive quotes. One that I love is. Eat to live not live to eat.
Then I laminated the picture and switch up the placemats around the table or when we are eating to keep a positive reinforcement going. (It also HELPS to NOT dip back into a second helping if you have just read a positive quote) (or if one of your placemats you have laminated happens to be a favorite pair of jeans you can no longer get into…take a picture of them and laminate to your place mat)
This idea may not work for everyone…but I have loved it!!
Laminate the food chart and at dinner it’s fun for the kids to check off if they have eaten everything recommended for that day. If so, they get excited or maybe they get a fun bed time snack.
Emotional eating? I do that!! I have noticed especially when I’m stressed. It’s a hard one especially when that is your HELP sort of speak to EAT and to comfort…In the long run it just makes my stress more because I ate so bad.
I have to mentally focus on something else and ONLY get through that MOMENT not look long term. Once I get through that moment…Move on to the next hour (If I have to) And…when all else is failing..I have to pray about it..to have the strength. I notice when I tell my INNER self I KNOW I can do it and truly believe it I can succeed.
I’m really having to work hard this week to NOT eat goodies. Because of my AWFUL weekend I have to really crack down on myself and be good!! It’s a struggle but I know I can do it and I will cheer anyone else on..Cause I know I will need the cheering on this week!!
Great post Liz