Admit Your Weakness. Find A Solution.

Posted on September 13th, 2008.

When it comes to our health, all of us have some sort of weakness that manages to get in the way of us achieving our goals and feeling our best. It doesn’t matter how fit or unfit a person is… everybody deals with some kind of temptation, weakness or personal struggle from time to time. In order to gain self-mastery over these destructive tendencies and to gain control over them, the first thing you need to do is step back, realize your weaknesses and admit to yourself what they are.

 

 

If you take some time to think about it, you will realize that it is physically impossible to find a solution for a particular problem, if you don’t admit to having the problem in the first place! You have to own up to your weakness in order to begin the process of fixing it and/or avoiding it altogether. You cannot CONQUER your personal weaknesses if you haven’t ACKNOWLEDGED and ACCEPTED them as your own!

 

Here’s an example to illustrate my point: For many years, I was unhappy with my body. It didn’t matter how thin I was, I always wanted to be thinner. I struggled daily with self-acceptance and would often feel disgusted and disappointed when I looked in a mirror. I always thought that MY PROBLEMS had something to do with my body not cooperating with me. No matter how hard I worked, I could not get my body down to a size two! I felt like something was wrong with me. I also thought a PROBLEM of mine was that I was not proportioned right. I believed that my hip bones were wider than they should be. I felt like I was cursed because I couldn’t be a straight little stick figure like other girls. It was a PROBLEM to me that I had curves. In a nutshell, I felt like my PROBLEMS were due to the fact that life is unfair. I just could not figure out why I wasn’t blessed with a so-called “perfect” body. 

 

With all of these PROBLEMS related to my physical body, I was never happy with myself. I never felt at peace with the way I was made. Life seemed to be clouded by the problems my body gave me. But what I didn’t realize, was that my problems had nothing to do with whether or not I could get down to a certain size or look a certain way. 

 

I had been completely OFF in my thinking! The problems that I VIEWED as being my problems, were actually made-up! They turned out NOT to be the REAL problems after all! Are you following me? For so many years, I wasted energy and enjoyment because I was trying to solve these ridiculous problems – yet, they were NOT the problems I was truly dealing with! The problem was NOT that my hips were too big or that my body was too curvy… that’s how God created me. I was meant to be shaped like that! And the fact that I couldn’t get down to a size two wasn’t a problem either… because when your hip bones are made to be curvy, it doesn’t matter how little body fat you have – your bones will not shrink! So being a size four to six was not a problem either! And what about feeling like life wasn’t fair because I didn’t have a so-called “perfect” body? Here’s a news alert for you! There is NO SUCH THING as a perfect body! What one person views as a perfect body is something completely different than what another person views as a perfect body! In fact, I once had a major awakening when a girl I didn’t know, (who had NO curves whatsoever) told me how much she hated her body and how she wished she could have curves like me! Wait a minute… SHE wanted to look like ME??? Um, was she kidding? I was sitting there wishing I could look like HER!!! Here was one of those AH-HA moments I will always be grateful for… I realized that maybe life was unfair to everybody… which would actually mean that life WAS fair to everybody! And if that was true, my beliefs about having an undesirable body just because life wasn’t fair, was now completely demolished! 

 

So what was my REAL problem then? Why was I struggling with and fighting so much against my body? Why was I so unhappy? How could I experience health – both physically and emotionally? How could I finally feel at peace with myself?

 

First of all, I had to take a big step back and look at myself through different eyes. I had to go beyond what I THOUGHT my problems were, and dive deep into the REAL issues at hand. It took a lot of time and a lot of little “ah-ha” moments along the way, but eventually I uncovered my real weaknesses! Once I was able to finally SEE and ADMIT and OWN UP to my weaknesses, I was able to come up with methods and solutions that would help me gain self-mastery over them. Now that I knew what the REAL problems were, I could SOLVE those problems and FINALLY put them to rest!

 

Going back to my example, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out what my real problems were. I was constantly thinking negative thoughts about myself. I was comparing myself to other people and tearing me down because of the differences between us. I let myself believe that if I looked the way someone else did, I would be happy. I fell into the trap that SO many of us do today… and that is thinking that we are never good enough… no matter how hard we work, our best is not THE best. 

 

When I finally understood what my problems and weaknesses were and when I realized how OFF I had really been, I felt like a new woman! I suddenly knew that I had to overcome these negative thinking patterns and if I did, I would not suffer from these ‘false problems’ that had plagued my life for so long. It was a wonderful thing to realize! Yet on the other hand, it was also a painful thing to realize! It’s never pleasant to admit our weaknesses to ourselves… but if we do, it can also be VERY liberating!

 

Of course, my personal example isn’t the only kind of weakness out there. What about people who think they have been cursed with a huge appetite… and that for some reason or another, they need more food than other – more lucky – people? People who fall into this category may feel angry and frustrated because they think that it’s not their fault they eat so much…. that they can’t help it. But is this REALLY the true problem? Or could it be that this person is suffering from emotional eating? Could it be that they are hiding their pain through eating? Emotional eating is a VERY common problem among people because food has a natural and very subtle way of making us feel good. It’s like a drug… a LEGAL and an ACCEPTABLE kind of drug. If life seems to be a bit dull, a little lonely, highly stressful, painfully sad or even absolutely blissful… food is there to excite, pacify, calm or celebrate with. Sometimes THIS is the real problem and the “huge appetite” is actually the false belief. 

 

Or what about people who feel like they have been burdened with an insanely hectic life and are frustrated because they cannot ever find time to exercise? They may resent others who seem to have life so easy and who have free time to dedicate to themselves. They may feel dismal toward their responsibilities and wish life could be easier. Could it be however, that the problem has nothing to do with the busy schedule? Is it possible that this person is actually a procrastinator and uses the “busy schedule” as an excuse? Is this person hiding from their REAL weakness? 

 

Is it easy to admit that you are an emotional eater? No way! Is it fun to accept that you are a procrastinator? Nope. Is it simple to acknowledge that you think negatively about yourself? Absolutely not! But discovering your weakness is absolutely ESSENTIAL if you want to find solutions to your problems. You cannot fix a real problem by being blind to the truth behind it.

 

If you are struggling with your health in some way… whether it is physical, spiritual or emotional… you DO have the power to overcome your weakness! 

 

If you are overweight and have a difficult time achieving your goals, what is it that is REALLY holding you back? Are you procrastinating? Do you eat emotionally? Do you let the negative comments of others discourage you? Do you let your OWN negative comments get in your way?

 

And how about those of you who are already at a healthy weight, yet feel unhappy and unsatisfied with your looks? Are your expectations realistic? Are you trying to be someone you’re not? Are you doubting a creation that God made? What is the root of your sadness? Do you dwell on negative thoughts about yourself? 

 

As uncomfortable as it may be, we HAVE to be brutally honest with ourselves if we want to improve our lives. We have to KNOW what our weaknesses are, so we can come up with tools to overcome those weaknesses. If we continue on in a state of “blindness” or denial about what are problems really are, we will continue suffering and will remain feeling awful. We WILL NOT be able to enjoy complete health and total peace in our lives if we don’t own up to the truth about ourselves!

 

Don’t let uneasy feelings stop you from finding out what your weaknesses are! Take a step back and look at your life. Look at where you are, why you are there and where you really want to be. Explore your feelings. Get down to the real issues at hand. I know that if you do, you can achieve physical, spiritual and emotional health and wellness! You CAN feel the way you WANT to feel! Life CAN be happy and full of content!

 

 

 

 

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